Presentation is Key

I'm having a very difficult time today.

I'm struggling because after having a brief conversation with my wife, and thus discovering that our communication styles are completely incompatible, I' wondering what to do.

My wife was raised with her mother being a screamer; someone who flies off the handle at the seemingly smallest thing and then berates the person she feels is the source of the issue or offence. This cause my wife to remove herself at an early age (16) from the family's home and go it on her own. She did just fine, and is by all accounts a successful business woman. 

But the result of the years of yelling by her mother made her resent anyone raising their voice; apparently regardless of the circumstances. Emotion is something to be tamed and restrained in order to better communicate; at least from what I have come to under stand. While this is not an unreasonable request, I do believe that there is room for expansion.

I am a confrontational person. This is viewed by my wife as a negative trait. I am emotional, this is also viewed by my wife as a negative trait; unless the emotions are deemed by her to be acceptable and tolerant of those present. I often find myself wondering, "Who made her the rule-maker?"

I have have been working on controlling my temper, in order to maintain peace in the household, for several months now. I have sought counselling, I have read books, I have prayed about it, I have spoken to my closest friends about it and have gotten little to no relief or understanding. I think the majority of people in this world are far too thinned skinned. People no longer confront the individual that has offended them, but rather prefer to talk to others (who weren't likely even present when the offence occurred) about a given situation, which is how hearsay rears its ugly head. Rumors begin to swirl. Second-hand information floats to the surface. It's maddening really.

Why does HOW information is presented become more important that the information be given?
Can we not, as a society, weed through the rhetoric, and raised vocal volumes to get to the issue-at-hand? Are we that lazy collectively?
If I genuinely care about a person, I'm willing to take the negative verbal presentation to get to the source of the communication without getting my boxers in a wad. It simply doesn't offend me. I suppose that I'm just a functioning sociopath......

There's A Larger Problem on The Hill

Sunday was an interesting day in Knoxville, Tennessee to say the very least.

University of Tennessee athletics director John Currie drafted a Memorandum of Understanding with Ohio State University defensive coordinator Greg Schiano to become U.T.'s 24th head coach in school history.

Things seemed to be progressing in a positive direction.......until......

The association between Greg Schiano and Penn State University during the Jerry Sandusky cover-up came to light. And whether Schiano knew something or didn't know anything that was ever proved in a court of law doesn't really matter to most folks in this area.
The fact that he was THERE does matter....

Schiano is at best a mediocre coach who, by all accounts, has thinner skin than either Derek Dooley or Butch Jones. (How is that even possible?)

The bigger issue to me is that the people running the show in the athletic's department even considered hiring this guy is a massive issue! 
I'm going to resort to the Clay Travis book of name-calling in describing these folks, but there's GOT to be greater accountability than what I've seen over the last few years. It's a complete dumpster fire and U.T. has become the punch line of jokes.

Is it karma for the way U.T. got rid of Phillip Fulmer?

Maybe.

Is it the curse of Johnny Majors?

Possibly.

I think the Vol fans need to take a long hard look at who's calling the shots on the Hill, whether it be Big Jim Haslam, or John Currie. Something has to change at the top because until it does, the head coach of the football team won't matter.